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Emptiness

It's strange how empty I feel inside without a 'day job'. I've been putting a lot into the Southern Living At HOME job, but I still get this feeling like I'm shirking work. It's like there is something I'm supposed to be doing and I'm ducking out of it. I'm too used to working my ass off that I don't know what to do when I'm not totally PLANNED.

The other strange thing? Getting a lump sum payment with 25% held out. See, you have that much taken out gradually across your salary and you don't realize the loss. You have it in black and white how much is held out in one payout and SHOCK!!!!!

I used to live on less than my severance each year, but then I didn't have a house, kids, big car payments, dogs, an elderly mother, so many bills.

I did my first 'reality' step today: I actually inquired about an opening at Starbucks. Unfortunately, it was only a night position, so I didn't apply. In the next week or so, if nothing else comes through, I'm going to apply at Michael's, Hobby Lobby and Joann's.

OH! I did apply this morning for a position that would be SO COOL. It's an affiliate marketing position with the Susan G. Komen Foundation. Wouldn't that be perfect???

Comments

( 2 thoughts — Whatcha' think? )
farley_warley
Oct. 10th, 2008 02:59 pm (UTC)
yaaaay job hunting!
i feel your pain, sister--it gets boring during the day when you're used to going at it like gangbusters for at least 8 hours a day for some company or another. i think i'm actually going to apply to starbucks, too :) good luck!
bamagirl92
Oct. 10th, 2008 10:49 pm (UTC)
Hang in there
Being out of work sucks. I've been there a couple of times in the last 10 years. It's always a mental test. Right now, you need to concentrate on you and the things that you need to handle medically...focus on the boys. Enjoy them as much as you can.

The position at Komen would be VERY VERY COOL. I'll keep my fingers crossed for that to come through. Have fun camping - enjoy the "Great Outdoors!". Talk to you when you get back. - Kim
( 2 thoughts — Whatcha' think? )